Christmas morning, awoken by the Not My Fault daughter power-chording her electric guitar, turned up to 10, with the fuzz thing turned on, and if she could get one of those Spinal Tap guitars that go to 11 she would have turned it up that one extra notch ("It's one louder").

Anyway, this year's lump of coal goes to Theresa Farrisi, substitute first grade music teacher, who told a room full of 6 and 7 year olds that Santa Claus doesn't exist. Really.

As if proponents of home-schooling don't have enough ammunition already...